Self Worth

    No matter what you do, sometimes it's just hard to be exactly what everyone wants. Some people may think you need a tan or maybe others think you should stay inside because "you're looking really dark". Maybe some people think you should let your stay in your natural state or maybe others like when you straighten or curl your hair. You have every right to choose what you want.

    When I was a young girl, I was really chunky and I felt like I would never be good enough for my family and friends. I remember telling my grandma Susan, and she took my hand and said, "there is not anything about yourself that makes myself or God love you any less. You are beautiful and however you want to look, I will always love you". I was a freshman in high school when she told me that and I have tried my best to live by that as much as I possibly could. I have tried to build myself up each and every time that someone may say something negative or rude to me. It may not be easy but it more than worth it. 

        

    Recently, I decided that I owed it to myself that I needed to do a much better job at building myself up but I had no idea where I should start. Then I thought, "what would grandma do?", so naturally, I called my aunt Meredith and we talked for quite some time. I think the most powerful thing that we talked about was grandma's mind set. There wasn't a single thing that could bring her down from a good mood, her happy little heart or her smokin' good looks. Grandma knew that she was the most beautiful woman to walk the earth and that's exactly how she helped her grand-babies. She taught us to love ourselves, and if you talked poorly to or about another grandkid, once grandma found out, nine times out of ten you probably got smacked. In that specific phone call, my aunt eventually says to me, "She might not be here any more, but she lives on in each of us. Who she was and what we learned from her will always be there. Her love will never go away" (Direct quote from Auntie Mer Mer). 

    So I don't do anything out of the ordinary, I simply remember that I am loved. Someone somewhere loves me. Whether that's my grandma watching over me, or any of my siblings and other family members, or maybe its my amazing friends that I made and other people that I met while serving in Houston. Maybe its from my volleyball friend group here in Idaho and I know for a fact its my amazing boyfriend and his loving family that I'll be lucky enough to call my own one day. It could easily be any of those people. But when it comes down to it, I love who I am. 

    I love that I have beautiful caramel skin. I love that I don't have to wear a lot of make up but I can if I want to. I can choose to be as skinny as a stick or I can be a little chunky. I love being happy and loving anyone and everyone. I love my smile and I wouldn't change it for anything. I wouldn't want to be shorter or wish that I was shorter. I love everything about myself even if sometimes I forget that. 

Remember who are you and who you hope to be, and never let that leave your mind. Strive to be that person each and every single day. Life is to short to spend another day not lovin' who you are!